This past Sunday, in a Rexburg ward, the sister in charge of the ward bulletin photoshopped a picture of her baby’s face onto baby Jesus. She superimposed her child’s face over the Christ child’s face and put it on the ward bulletin. I cried. I cried when I heard this, because it’s basically the funniest [...]
Browsing Posts in Blasphemy!
Oh, how I wish I could take all of my Internet homies with me to my sociology of religion class. We could all sit in the back and snort whenever anybody says something ridiculous, which is like, every six seconds. Like the girl who said that non-religious people have nothing to hold their marriages together. [...]
Are you guys ready for my latest Pinterest find? If God wants to be a part of my marriage, the least he could do is make dinner a couple of nights a week.
My brothers and sisters, Look at the image of the animal below: My grandfather took one look at that animal and said, “That is either a dog or a cat.” Upon observing that it doesn’t bark like a dog, the only logical conclusion is that it is a cat– every fiber of its being is [...]
Recently I attended Sunday School– Mormon Sunday School. (TBM lurkers rejoice!) OMFG it was so boring. It was so painfully dull. I was really hoping for a geriatric shouting match like last time I attended Sunday School in 2006, but I was disappointed. Here’s what I learned: The Jews killed Jesus. They were totes guilty [...]
Y’all need to download the Songify app because then you can do awesome stuff like this: In Our Lovely Deseret
This quote showed up on Facebook today: The real story of America is the one that shows the hand of God in our nation’s beginning. – Ezra Taft Benson Where’s the hand of God now? Why can’t the hand of God give us affordable healthcare and higher education, or end hunger, prejudice, inequality, poverty and [...]
A few weeks ago, when I was still wrangling small children in exchange for a very small amount of money, I overheard a conversation that made me sad: M. holds up a picture of an old woman and says, “This is God!” H. says, “God is a boy!” M., crestfallen, returns to her work, while [...]
This morning as I was driving to work, I couldn’t get my car into 4-wheel-drive. Sometimes the “magic stick,” as I like to call it, gets all steadfast and immovable. This was problematic as it was snowing lavishly and I was sliding all over the road, which isn’t much fun at all. After wrestling with the magic [...]
Eliza: You know, for a guy who doesn’t really believe in God, you sure are superstitious. Mr. Snitch: I can’t help it. It’s been ingrained in me. Eliza: That’s like getting upset because I called your imaginary friend a cock or something. Mr. Snitch: I don’t have an imaginary friend. Eliza: I know, but lots [...]
